Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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