We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
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My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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