dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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