I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
