I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
