This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
