You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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