Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
