put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
