Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
