So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
