Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize