At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
How many fucks given?
0.12846
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
