I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
