the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
