I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
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