she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize