i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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