What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
