I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
