i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Farmville is her only friend.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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