I bet he comes in French.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
There are leaves in my underwear?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
