Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
