batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
