I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
