Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Welp...herpes.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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