roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize