I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
