Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
