I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize