I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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