he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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