nut hugger
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
