I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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