Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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