it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I wish there were birth control emojis
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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