she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
