So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
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