If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
