god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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