Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
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