I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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