I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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