So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize