Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
someone get that fucking seahorse.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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