im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
