I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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