So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
