Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He felt like a one man threesome
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
