I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
My vagina just clenched in fear
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
