I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
