So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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